A little note from your lord and master

I had a major shock today, the world does not resolve around my little house. In fact out behind it there is a whole bigger world. Today Humans and felines, I went... OUTSIDE. I don’t mind telling you all that I was in fact quite scared, there is so much stuff out there and sooo many new smells. I have to say I was momentarily alarmed.

Though it has given my ‘World domination’ plan a little bit of reassessing to think about, for instance it’s going to have to be bigger. I WILL have everyone in this vast world cower and my paws.

Musings of a sensitive cat.

I believe that when I am finally in power I am going to make all humans do a mandatory scratch of my ears every morning. It’s just so nice sitting their having your ears played with. Of course once I have had enough of the attention I have to attack the hand that is doing the scratching, how else are they to know that they are no longer permitted to touch me?

The dog and I have not been getting on too well lately; I believe that she is trying to muscle in on my space. I do believe that she has her own agenda and has growing ambition that she too will rule the world. This is just not on. She must realise that only a superior being such as me would surely be capable of completing such a fete as domination and then ruling. I don’t know what she’s thinking, all she seems to care about is food, and really what kind of world will that be if we are all made to bring her food. Oh no it just won’t do! I’ll just have to have a little chat with the bitch...